When to let go of your really close friends
Let me start with an example. At work, you’ll see that some guys are insensitive at times and sensitive other times. If you notice, he acts insensitive only when he is around a group of people or a close friend, it’s only because that’s who he is for that group-of-people/friend around him. But, when he isn’t around that friend, he (all-of-a-sudden) acts sensitive. One more example, just notice how you act when you are with your college friends and how you act with your office (close) friends. You might see some change in the way you behave. Your college friends and your office friends like two (slightly) different versions of you.
So, if you are trying to drastically change for good (voluntarily), you will have a really tough time bringing in that change. Guess who is in your way? It’s your close family and friends (especially, friends).
Say, I smoke a lot. If I realize that I must stop smoking and that my obsession with smoking is really harmful. I will have conquered my own self and I will be ready to quit smoking. But what about my current reputation? people around me have gotten used to the fact that I smoke a lot and that I am cool (may be). This, quitting smoking, change is going to change me as a person and that is something the people around me (especially, my close friends) are not ok with. She loves me right now, she isn’t sure if she will love the-future-me, so, she doesn’t want me to change.
Many a times, your friends-love-for-who-you-are-right-now outweighs your change benefits, and you end up not brining in the required change. But frankly, if you are trying to bring in a drastic change in you (for good), the best thing to do is to let go of your friends. Change your job, change your job location, go to a place where people don’t know you and where people can start loving the changed-you. You’ll see that bringing in that drastic-change is not that difficult. Mind it! You still love your old-friends, but unfortunately, the new-you needs to let go of them (for some time at least, till you bring in that really required change.)
PS: This applies only when the change in question is really-really-drastic (a.k.a life changing.)
So, if you are trying to drastically change for good (voluntarily), you will have a really tough time bringing in that change. Guess who is in your way? It’s your close family and friends (especially, friends).
Say, I smoke a lot. If I realize that I must stop smoking and that my obsession with smoking is really harmful. I will have conquered my own self and I will be ready to quit smoking. But what about my current reputation? people around me have gotten used to the fact that I smoke a lot and that I am cool (may be). This, quitting smoking, change is going to change me as a person and that is something the people around me (especially, my close friends) are not ok with. She loves me right now, she isn’t sure if she will love the-future-me, so, she doesn’t want me to change.
Many a times, your friends-love-for-who-you-are-right-now outweighs your change benefits, and you end up not brining in the required change. But frankly, if you are trying to bring in a drastic change in you (for good), the best thing to do is to let go of your friends. Change your job, change your job location, go to a place where people don’t know you and where people can start loving the changed-you. You’ll see that bringing in that drastic-change is not that difficult. Mind it! You still love your old-friends, but unfortunately, the new-you needs to let go of them (for some time at least, till you bring in that really required change.)
PS: This applies only when the change in question is really-really-drastic (a.k.a life changing.)
